Spiritual Practices and Emotional Reactions

[kokopelle]

Recently I had an educational tussle on a LJ group. As part of her instructive response, erthymamma said:

I think everyone is going to have a different view on what makes someone worthy of being a religious leader. Same as people having a difference of opinion of make someone a good parent, driver, lover etc. I think however the discussion gets more heated when it is about religious leaders because of what we are entrusting them with. Our faith. Human faith in my experience is nothing to be toyed with. A lot of people are aware that like trust, faith is hard gained and easily lost.

This statement was an eye-opener for me. I realized that people (in general) have aggressive reactions when people talk about how people "do" religion. The most pointed comments came from people with 10+ and 20+ years as a priests and/or teachers. IMO, my statements were deemed as stating absolute facts about their religious lives, prompting the rightful guardians to move to action. I was seen as an outsider. This view is properly so if the measure of authority and belongness equates to levels of recognized training. While my comments were offered in the spirit of general discussion, they were addressed as if I were attacking or corrupting people's cherished beliefs. In their reality I was. I used words that held deep spiritual meaning, embedded in mystery teachings. In this view, the response is not unexpected.

What is the big lesson for me? I need to be very aware of when I use those words connected with people's spiritual practices. I could offer my understandings as questions. An alternative is to state my beliefs as broad generalities. The challenge is that when general statements are implanted with tradition specific words, the words can become statements of specific fact for those who have an emotional connection to the information. Shoot, I've lived this when people have made "incorrect" statements about shamanic topics. A similar reaction from others is a warning shot across my bow of blogging. Heard and heeded!

Comments

[sunfell.livejournal.com]

Experience builds insight. One learns that there are many different paths to understanding. There is no 'one true way'. There is no 'one true god/dess', either.

Time brings the understanding that truth has three sides: yours, theirs, and what actually happened.

Religious discussion is like crossing a minefield on a pogo stick. You always risk getting blown up if you land in the wrong spot.

[erthymamma.livejournal.com]

I did not see you at all as being an outsider. In fact I cherish everyone's opinon on religious matters. I just know that opinons about anything are subjective. I think you have and had valuable information and insight that I really enjoyeed reading. My main issue was with others believing that because they have x amount of years of training makes them better.

We should talk sometime I think it would be revealing for both of us

[chimerae.livejournal.com]

Mark Twain: "Sacred cows make the best hamburger"

I'm not quite sure what it is you're wanting to do here, but I personally do not believe that it's possible to pursue Truth (capitol T) unless we are willing to lay out our incomplete and evolving personal truths (small t)

There such a thing as adolescent stirring up trouble for the glee of causing trouble but I don't hear that in your communication.

I'm wondering if you are blogging in de facto theological "ghettos" where "like minded" individuals collect and posture their ontology as reality. The urge to go tribal like that is very human and understandable but the only correct and approved behavior is the student supplicant role. Even that will only be approved to the degree that it affirms the ontology.

Just a thought. . .

[greensh.livejournal.com]

What do I want here? The general act of blogging serves several of my needs. The first is to provide a repository for lines of thought that I have. In this mode I am pretty much writing for myself. The act of writing down these thoughts allows me to better organize them. The second reason I blog is for the wonderful feedback I receive. Any and all feedback is very much valued and appreciated. The third reason is that blogging is good practice for writing bigger and better stuff in the future. Win, win, win.

I've met some really neat people by putting my small truths out there. I've also met other people. Part of me is very much the social anthropologist. I really desire to understand people. Sometimes you have to see all sides to get a "complete" picture of possibilities.

[greensh.livejournal.com]

The updating of my profile is on my "to-do" list. Why? I really want to share thoughts with a big audience. I want to learn from a big audience. Before some people's ears and mouths will open, they first need to have a comfort level with where a person is coming from. This is not unreasonable. It seems the pagan community seems to be traumatized by insincere or unqualified bloggers. I don't fully understand this yet. It is on my "to-understand" list (grin).

All that said, I will present myself honestly. If people are looking for a specific lineage or tradition before I start existing, than I just won't exist for them. Life is as it should be when I feel I have integrity in my words.

[greensh.livejournal.com]

You say the most pointed things in lovely erudite ways. I love it! You are quite right. Sometimes I think I am quite too polite.

[franciscan.livejournal.com]

I love your last sentence.....

[franciscan.livejournal.com]

And I'm wondering if in a few hundred years, the notion of "religious leader" will be rather antiquated. AS I delve deeper, I am aware that the ultimate teacher is within, and that authority comes from the recognition of that reality. Partriarchy, which would place spiritual authority outside the individual and in the hands of a select few, is dying, if not already dead. The process of growth I am moving through is but a microcosm of a more vast and expanded growth we are all experiencing - that of learning who we truly are. We see the trapping of patriarchy crumbling around us and it is tempting to try to patch things up. I think though, it is neccessary to let it complete its death process. In the meantime, I am seeking to associate with folks that honor the teaching that the realm of the divine is within. We are all religious leaders in that sense.

[greensh.livejournal.com]

Agreed!

The human experience is one of ebbs and flows. The neopagan reaction to the patriarchs was to flow to a matriarch system. The Dianic tradition is probably the strongest example. There are many incredibly valid exceptions to a matriarchal shift. IMO, the ideal neopagan emphasis is on a shifting balance between divine genders. However, many have a matriarchal leaning. Your comments got me thinking that from the outside, and on the whole, the neopagan matriarchal expression of spirituality is having the same struggles as the patriarchal.

The musing topic of the "why" of matriarchal emphasis is an interesting one. Another time...

[greensh.livejournal.com]

I look forward to your posts!

[franciscan.livejournal.com]

It is about balance, perhaps. But for those of us who have expreienced firsthand the worst of what patriarchy can do, it can be somewhat difficult to welcome that balance, since it would involve welcoming also that which has been so active in our oppression.

But I do believe that as we move into a new apradygm, the qualities that we have so separated out in the genders will come together naturally, and our understanding will shift to recognize and allow the balance to happen.

[greensh.livejournal.com]

I purposely used the word "shifting" in reference to balance. IMO the occurance of an absolute balance is a momentary event. For now, the neopagan shift is rightly to the matriarch side, probably due to the oppression you sited. The neopagan mixed groups I intereact with do have a balance of sorts. Interestingly, the degree of the shift is sometimes dependent on the personality of the leaders, but what's new? (smile)

[erthymamma.livejournal.com]

The traumatization may be true but because of it they are now turning away the sincere and honest person. Thatis like throwing the baby out with the bath water. Anyone with insight should be able to discern from anothers words their intention.

If you feel parading your knowledge for all to see will help you I am all for it. I just do not feel it should be necessary to be heard and when you do it you just reinforce to everyone that their actions are vaild and needed.

just my opinon. Keep talking, those who want to hear you will no matter what your lienage is

[greensh.livejournal.com]

Thank you. My "resume" probably won't convince/impress anybody who needs their actions to be validated. People are strange, very strange indeed!