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kokopelleDaniel Goldman’s book “Social Intelligence” talks about the concept of “mindsight”. This is roughly defined as the ability to peer into the mind of a person to sense their feelings and deduce their thoughts. The goal is to then react appropriately to the picture presented. This is the part I found fascinating… the author says that mindsight demands the following basic skills: (1) distinguishing oneself from others and (2) perceive situations from another perspective and (3) realizing that other’s aims may not be in one’s own best interests.
I find this to have a large kernel of truth. Those people who I would categorize as “socially oblivious”, for good, bad or ugly, seem to lack one or more of these basic skills. The reasons are varied and span the spectrum of nature to nurture. I strongly suspect that most people are weak in some of these skills, myself included. Weak does not mean deficient. There is just room for improvement. The challenge of maturing and gaining self awareness is to sense where our weaknesses are and address them to the benefit of ourselves and others.
I find this to have a large kernel of truth. Those people who I would categorize as “socially oblivious”, for good, bad or ugly, seem to lack one or more of these basic skills. The reasons are varied and span the spectrum of nature to nurture. I strongly suspect that most people are weak in some of these skills, myself included. Weak does not mean deficient. There is just room for improvement. The challenge of maturing and gaining self awareness is to sense where our weaknesses are and address them to the benefit of ourselves and others.
